When Half a Billion Isn't Enough

10.01.2003

I've been seeing a lot lately about the latest Forbes 400 list coming out. Seeing as how my interest in wrestling has been wanning of late, I decided to look and see how much Vince (WWE head Vincent K McMahon to those of you that know no better) was doing.

A quick look at 2000 saw #260 with $1.1 billion in net worth. That was followed by the XFL fiasco in 2001 that saw him drop to #364 and $700 million. His net worth continued to drop in 2002 as he fell to #386 and $570 million. This year, Vince doesn't even make the list, although he managed to up his worth to $575 million.

I get mad when I lose a $20 bill. I would hate to find out I was worth $600 million less than I was 3 years ago. Of course, I'm not worth $600 million now, am I? I'm barely worth $600!

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Preventing Hotlinking 101

09.30.2003

I was looking at the weblogs for the weekend and found that a country music messageboard had shot up to become my #2 refferer. Wondering what this was all about I went to see what was going on. It seems I have a pic of Toby Keith wrestling that was being linked to from their message board.

I have no problem with people using images. Heck, this was one of the few pictures that I actually took myself, but it's the bandwidth that goes along with them linking to the picture here that bugs me. If I had unlimited bandwidth, I wouldn't worry about it. And to be honest, it's probably not enough bandwidth to worry about, but it's just the spirit of the bandwidth pirate that bothers me.

So I went off to see what I could do. I basically can only modify the .htaccess file as opposed to the Apache config file (boy I miss having my own server). I Google search later and I found what I needed to add to the .htaccess file to prevent the site from linking to my images:

Options +FollowSymLinks
RewriteEngine on
RewriteCond %{HTTP_REFERER} ^http://(boards.)?countryweekly.com [NC]
RewriteRule .(jpe?g|gif)$ - [NC,F]

I went back to the message board and the pic doesn't show up any longer, so it looks like it worked! So, if anyone else needs a little help to keep people linking to your images, try the above in your .htaccess file [changing (boards.)?countryweekly.com to (www.)?badsite.com where appropriate].

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Crazy Uncle Russ Strikes!

09.29.2003

Saturday I went with Jer and young Hellzapoplin to Toys R Us. But it wasn't just any trip to TRU, it was to be her first trip. Ah, a fresh mind to populate with the goodness of toys!

The high point was when Jer went in search of diapers. We went to the diaper aisle in the back of the store and Jer searched for diapers. At this point Helen, sitting politely in the buggy, pointed down another aisle as her eyes lit up. I looked and found she had spied the Teletubby aisle. Beinga year and a quarter, Helen is all about the Teletubbies. So I did what any self respecting, single, crazy uncle would do.

I parked the buggy right next to the Teletubbies, stood back, and watched the mayhem begin.

Everythingin reach quickly started to find it's way into the buggy. "Po" she would say as she pulled Po off the shelf. "Na Na" as La-La followed. "Po!" and another Po came into the buggy. Soon she was covered in Teletubbies, which was quite a sight since she's about the size of a Teletubby.

I managed to talk Jer into getting all 4 of the Teletubbies for her (ok, I might have gotten a couple for her...). Once she got home and Elaine was present, we started to pull Teletubbies out of bags. It being her first trip to Toys R Us, Helen didn't know that things go from the shelf to the buggy to a bag to home, so it was all a great surprise to her. With each Teletubby her eyes would widen more as she came ever closer to excitement driven hyperventilation.

Four Teletubbies turned out to be too many to hug at one time, so she would take turns hugging them in pairs and the occasional trio. By the time I had to leave the floor was riddled with Teletubbies and their 1:12 scale predecessors, and Helen was way past time for her nap and still seemed to be growing strong.

If only Toys R us had stocked the Rock action figure I was wanting to get her, this may have turned out all different.

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402

09.24.2003

Last night, I finally managed to both find and purchase a set of scales that would (hopefully) handle my weight. For the past 3 years (at least) when I go to the doctor, my weight is listed as 350+ since their scales only go to 350lbs.

"Scales that only go to 350" isn't a good thing to have in your vocabulary.

So I bought the new scales, took them home, set them on the hard floor and prepared myself for the worse.

402

402 pounds. That's me. I was trying to imagine what 402 lbs actually is. In his prime, Hulk Hogan weighed 302 lbs, and he's got at least half a foot on me. A 1972 Suzuki GT380 motorcycle weighed 402 lbs. The N809S Glider can carry a maximum of 402 lbs, but that doesn't really help with what the weight is (but handy to know if I ever find myself in a pick-a-hanglider-or-die situation). The shipping weight of an original Missile Command arcade game is 402 lbs. The 2001 Texas State Record Squat (16-17 year old div.) was 402 lbs.

The bright side is that one guy managed to lose 402 lbs! Of course, it was using Herbalife, but once you get to a certain size you have to start trying everything.

Now I have to start figuring out what all to try.

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Confused Crazy Uncle Russ

09.23.2003

In my never ending quest to both drive Jerry and Elaine crazy while providing a bad influence to their daughter, I've been trying to find the right time to bestow upon young Hellzapoplin the gift of the Wiggles. They have the perfect tunes to get stuck in a young mind (do a Kazaa search for "Fruit Salad"), which should dirve her parents mad as she toddles around making music. But I think she may have a little longer before the tunes can take hold of her mind properly.

I happened upon the Wiggles one morning while flipping channels during breakfast. I paused because I was confused by four grown men with horrible acting skills looking like they really didn't want to be there, singing their little ditties. It was hilarious. After that, I noticed that the cd player above the entrance to Toys R Us is always playing Wiggles songs.

Lately I've been getting up earlier (pre Wiggle o'clock evidently), so my channel surfing has uncovered another cute show: Hi 5. The best part about this show is that it's got hot chicks! I thought I would find out more about these hot chicks, so a search lead me to their official fan site. The only problem is, these are totally different hot chicks! It looks like there's an Austrailian version and a TLC version. What the hell is going on here? Is one an evil counterpart of the other? Do both share catchy childrens tunes? Are they heading toward an ultimate battle showdown where only the victor will be known as "Hi 5"? Now I have no idea what to poison young Hellzapoplin's mind with. The horror! The tragedy!

Wait, this means double the hot chicks. Maybe this isn't so bad after all. (Now I sneak off to listen to some Wiggles "Fruit Salad"...)

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